Looking for an after atlantis fic where john is dead

[erica zhou]

Hi, I'm looking for a fic where rodney is a professor at a university without a great science program. It's after atlantis and he creates weirdly intense courses about the worst case scenarios that are mentally and emotionally traumatic for his students.

John is already dead.

There's one scene where the lights go out in his lecture hall and there's a flash of lightening outside that brings rodney back to those life or death situations in atlantis and he freaks out and is posed to return fire behind his podium. And after that, one of his students who was prior service asks him where he served and rodney says he was always a civilian, and his student says that civilian or not, rodney's obviously lived through some horrific things.

Towards the end of the fic, rodney realizes that his students won't have much of a chance in the professional world despite the training he's put them through because of the school's lack of reputation, so he starts publishing again.

I really loved this fic and really want to read it again, so i would appreciate any assistance.

Thanks.