Jack mentally centering himself

[mcatyoung.livejournal.com]

I vaguely remember reading a story that I'm going to have difficulty explaining. I think it used Jack as a POW to explain his actions. I don't really remember what sets him off each time. I think he has a padlocked shed in his backyard or maybe it's a room in his basement. Before he goes to do something he really doesn't want to do, he goes to the shed or room. Inside it's pitch black and has a cement floor. He sits naked on the floor getting himself into the head space he needs. I think he makes do with other facilities when he's away from home. That's pretty much all I remember and it's been years since I read it. The majority of what I read is slash so it's highly probable it was a Jack/Daniel fic. I hate unhappy endings so if there were any kind of death fic warning I most likely wouldn't have read it. I've searched for this story periodically over the years with no luck. Does anyone recognize it?

Tagging this was a challenge since I don't really remember much at all.

thanks
mary